I have windows XP Media Center w/SP3.

I would like to have the open dialog box open in details mode, right now it opens in list mode. Is there a way to make Windows or the programs to do this??

There is an icon near the upper right corner that when you click on it you get to customize your view, but I think that you have to do that every time you use the Open dialogue box; as it defaults into List view.

it's hard coded in some obscure windows .dll file. no way to change it that i've ever found.

Try this...

Set it to the way you like, then hold the Ctrl key and click on Cancel or X (in the upper right)

[edit]
Ignore me on that. I tried it out and it does not work. The strange thing is I remember successfully doing that, maybe something changed with one of the XP Service Packs.